Do you ever have a Sunday night with darkness and clouds that roll in? The end of a long day and an even longer week? Does it ever feel like you have poured yourself out and having nothing left to give? That you desperately need to be refilled, restored, and renewed?
Last night was one of those nights. On Sundays I try to rest – to take a Sabbath – and it was a relaxing one. But my exhaustion came with the physical pain I felt once again in my stomach. That nagging, incessant pain that always returns – like that neighbor’s dog that barks constantly. Every day. Day after day. Then one day – maybe two or even three days even if you are lucky – it doesn’t bark. And you sigh, “Oh, glorious relief!”
But the next day it returns… yet again.
Last night I felt my hope of healing slipping away, my joy waning, my energy fading. I felt depleted, spent, empty. But the beautiful thing about the night? It’s not all over. Morning is coming. The sun will rise again.
“Weeping my tarry for a night, but joy comes in the morning.”
Thankfully, joy did come for me this morning. Restoration, renewal, and reminders of God’s goodness, grace, mercy, and love flooded my heart as I awoke and walked down to the ocean. God showed up, met me where I was at, and faithfully provided me with little reminders of His presence:
Three songs in a row on my shuffle about shining.
His sun rising and shining on a new day.
Warm summer morning air, fresh and clean.
The smiling face of a passing stranger, contagious, bringing a smile upon my own.
The smell of salty ocean air, beautiful clouds, and rolling waves.
Stopping to smell a rose with the sweetest fragrance.
The t-shirt of a woman that read, “Finish the fight.”
A voicemail from my sweet boyfriend praying aloud for me.
A new day, a new week, a new start.
Mondays. They often have a negative connotation, a feeling of dread, of “back to the grind.” But for me, this Monday has a positive one. I am feeling restored. And for that I am grateful.
“You’re a good, good Father; it’s who you are, it’s who you are, it’s who you are.”
“We’re gonna shine like lightning even when our back’s against the wall.”
“Today, today, live like you wanna. Let yesterday burn and throw it in the fire.”