planning your wedding while planning your marriage: week 16 “in sickness”

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This past week Clay was pretty sick. For the entire (almost) year we have been together, I don’t think I have ever seen him sick. I call him my “rock,” and truly he is so strong. I was literally thinking about that earlier this week, and maybe I jinxed it because not two days later had he come down with a cold and a fever. He even had to stay home from the Mexico mission trip he had planned.

As I sit here and reflect on this topic of “in sickness,” I think of the vows that Clay and I will make in just a couple of months. We have been deciding whether we will write our own vows, but whatever we do Clay wants to make sure we say the traditional ones as well. My initial thought in our discussion was that the traditional vows can feel so rote when you have been to so many weddings and heard those same words repeated over and over. But Clay made a great point that when you really think about what you are saying, those vows truly are so meaningful. And I actually couldn’t agree more.

I think of the phrase “in sickness and in health” and I think of all the unknown that lies ahead of us in marriage. I was able to finally take care of Clay on Friday for the first time in our relationship (during which he has taken care of me in recovering from two different surgeries – and probably a couple other illnesses), and I was so happy to do it. I found such joy in getting to take care of this man that I love.

But there are potentially sicknesses that lie ahead in marriage that will be much more trying than a one-day fever. So as I am preparing for this marriage to this man, I prepare my heart to love him in both great health and good times as well as whatever sickness and adversity may lie ahead. I don’t know what the future holds, but I know that whatever path lies ahead of us I want to walk it with this man at my side, holding my hand, and hopefully laughing and finding joy… even in sickness.

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”  – Proverbs 17:17

Instead of seeing a weakness or limitation as a point of frustration, Proverbs 17:17 calls us to let adversity define our commitment, call out the best in us, and depend on God’s love working through us.” – Gary Thomas

 “If we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.” – 1 John 4:12

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