what beautiful things I’ve seen

It is the song that plays through our engagement video. And it’s the song that’s been running through my head lately as I revel in life with this little miracle.⠀ 10 weeks: The day...

remembering my future

Yesterday we took Noelle to church for the very first time. And our pastor preached on Colossians 1:11-14 which begins: “May you be made strong with all the strength that comes from his glorious...

in the wake of a breakdown

I wrote this post last Sunday… This morning as I nursed her, in the rocking chair in her nursery, in the dim light of the morning sun, her little fingers wrapped around my thumb...

pregnancy and infant loss remembrance

“When a child loses his parent, they are called an orphan. When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or widower. When parents lose their child, there isn’t a...

what’s in my non-toxic shower

When I first got pregnant and started reading pregnancy books and articles, every single one of them talked about not using certain cleaning products or personal care products… and well, if I shouldn’t use...

a crown of beauty instead of ashes

It was our wedding passage—one God had spoken to me the night we got engaged and one our pastor “happened” to surprise us with on that day. I had waited an awful long time...

the day we became parents

October 3. It’s a hard day. It’s the day we became parents. To babies we would never get to hold. It’s been quite a journey of healing over this last year. And I still...

you can do hard things

You can do hard things. It’s a reminder I need for myself daily. I never expected my labor to be 18 hours. And I didn’t want an epidural. Some way, somehow—with the help of...

and then one day she’s here…

And then one day she’s here. And she’s absolute perfection. And sometimes I just stare at her in disbelief that I grew her inside of me. I look at her tiny, intricate eyelids and...

Noelle’s birth story

On Wednesday, August 21, I woke up at 7am to a contraction. They began coming fairly regularly. After four nights of false labor (what a trick!), I was thrilled to finally be in actual labor!...